Dear Daddy: can fat boys be good sons too?

Sir, I have a question. My daddy and I are very early in our relationship, but I'm nervous about things eventually escalating. I'm a very fat trans boy, and daddy's so slim and sexy... can fat boys be good sons too? 

 

No. 

Now let me tell you why. It’s not your weight nor is it being trans that will stop you: It is your view of yourself. See, before we’ve even spoken you’ve put words between who you are and what I am allowed to see of you. They aren’t bad things in and of themselves BUT when used like this, as reasons you might be disqualified, they become something much worse.
First off take a look at your last sentence: “Can Fat boys be good sons too?” This actually makes me a little cross for a few reasons but lets keep it simple and break it apart as a ‘thought’: “Can X be Y (in spite of X)”? the last part is unspoken but directly implied in the statement and it says that you feel that what you are means you are somehow less capable of being a good boy, that being ‘fat’ or ‘femme’ or ‘trans’ is some sort of disability in terms of being a son.

They aren’t.

Not unless you allow them to take this form. You are too concerned with what a mirror says, what others have said, and that has kept you from reaching out properly for what it is that you wish to be. Anything that makes you feel ashamed is a reason someone will desire you BUT it also is a reason that you can’t be a good boy: it keeps you from looking up.
I know this kind of ‘talk’ can go sideways and get away from me, because I feel VERY strongly about it, but I want to make it perfectly clear here:
The only thing that can keep you from being a good son is YOU. What you focus your thoughts on divides your energy between being who you wish to be and who you feel like you oughtn’t to be. Put aside ‘childish things’, like the lies your mirror (person or object) that tells you these things, and accept that WHO you are trumps any label on  ‘what’ you think you are.
To me, and to other Daddies out here in the big world, you’re already on the right track you just need to learn to set aside the negative things that hold you back because they are what’s keeping you from someone like me. That you have found a Daddy who accepts you should be the ONLY confirmation you need that what I am saying is right: that his feelings for you are what should matter more than your negative thoughts about yourself. You simply don’t have the time to waste dividing the energy you should be spending on being happy between fear and doubt. Accept that he sees what you can’t easily: that you’re someone he values and desires.

Now, onto the rest of your question.
If you are afraid that things are moving too quickly, or may because of feelings you are developing, then talk to your Daddy. Good communication is crucial for things to work properly. A good Daddy is also a good listener and will help you work with him to find the best answer for both of you.

I will never advise someone to leap in headfirst, that’s not my way. I prefer careful consideration and caution, especially early on. You are right to be concerned but you have to remember that twinge of fear is a reminder that you have growing feelings and that you feel much is at stake. It’s a useful feeling if you let it help you keep from diving in too quickly but you have to moderate even that by balancing it with what you are feeling.

If you’re nervous because it either is, or feels like, a ‘first time’ is about to happen: talk to your Daddy. Explain how you feel, be honest and as clear as you can be and ask for his help and guidance (most of us get off on that a bit LOL).
So please be sure to understand:

There’s nothing wrong with you that someone won’t feel is right about you, and that the only thing that can keep you from being a good boy is you.